Archive for the ‘Animal’ Category
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Chatty Parrot
Chatty Parrot
An elderly woman was looking for a pet to be a good companion and not much trouble.
The pet store owner suggested a parrot, showed it to her and guaranteed her it would be a wonderful companion.
The woman asked if it would behave if she took it to church with her on Sundays.
The owner said [...] -
Horse Walks Into A Bar
A Horse Walks Into A Bar
A horse walks into a bar, he sits down and the bartender asks him, “Why the long face?” The second horse walks in with jumper cables attached to it’s head, he sits down, and the bartender says, “I don’t mind the long face, but don’t u go and try to [...] -
Surprise
Surprise
One evening, as Uncle John and his wife are entertaining guests with cocktails, they are interrupted by an out-of breath little Johnny who shouts out, “Uncle John! Come quick! The bull is fucking the cow!” Uncle John, highly embarrassed, takes young little Johnny aside and explains that a certain decorum is required. “You should have [...] -
Driving with Penguins
Driving with Penguins
A man was driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back seat. The police stop him and say that he can’t drive around with the penguins in the car and should take them to the zoo. The man agrees and drives off.
The next day the same man is driving down the [...] -
Drunk Giraffe
Drunk Giraffe
A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. He walks up to the bar and takes a seat, the giraffe does the same. The man orders a beer for himself and a double scotch for the giraffe. They both proceed to drink and after a while they order the same again. They continue [...] -
Camel Joke
The Camel Joke
There’s this guy walking along a road to town with his camel. Along the way, a guy stops and ask’s if he needs a ride to town. The guy say’s, yeah. He hop’s in, the driver say’s, what about your camel. The guy said, Oh, he’s ok, he know’s his way to town. [...] -
Two Bear Hunters
Two Bear Hunters
Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could.
He [...] -
Cow Tail
Cow Tail
A foursome was on the last hole and when the last golfer drove off the tee he hooked into a cow pasture. He advised his friends to play through and he would meet them at the clubhouse. They followed the plan and waited for their friend.
After a considerable time he appeared disheveled, bloody, and [...] -
Adopted Turtle
Adopted Turtle
Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.
The turtle tried again and again while a [...] -
Talking Parrots
A lady approaches her priest and tells him : “Father I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but [...]
