Archive for the ‘Dead Baby’ Category
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Dead Baby Jokes 14
How do you get a baby to run faster?
Chase it with the lawn mower.
What do you get when you put a dead baby in a blender?
Hold on. I’ll tell you in a second.
What’s pink and spits?
A baby in a frying pan.
What’s the best sound in the world?
Hearing dead baby’s hips crack under pressure!
How many dead [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 13
What’s the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies?
I don’t have a Cadillac in my garage.
What’s the best thing about a Siamese twin baby?
Threesomes.
What is the definition of revenge?
A baby with a dog in its mouth.
What’s the difference between a baby and a bagel?
You can put a bagel in the toaster. You [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 12
What’s worse than a dead baby in a trashcan lid?
A trashcan lid in a dead baby.
What’s the difference between a lamp and a dead baby?
It’s really easy to turn on a lamp.
What’s pink and chunky?
A baby with leprosy.
Why did the baby cross the road?
It was stapled to the chicken.
What’s the difference between a dead baby [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 11
How many dead babies does it take to make a bottle of baby oil?
It depends on how hard you squeeze them.
What’s small, and shiny, and blue?
A baby with a plastic baggy over its head.
What’s got four wheels, smokes and squeals?
A bus load of babies on fire.
Why is there always hot water at childbirth?
In case of [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 10
What does a baby and a Pinto have in common?
They’re fun to ride until they die.
What’s red, screams and goes around in circles?
A baby with its foot nailed to the floor.
What bounces up and down at 100mph?
A baby tied to the back of a truck.
How do you get a baby out of a tree?
You give [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 9
Why do you stick a baby in the blender feet first?
So you can see the expression on its face!
What’s worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning?
Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.
What’s the difference between a dead baby and a felt tip marker?
You don’t get [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 8
How do you get 100 babies into a bucket?
With a blender!
Why do you put a baby in the blender feet first ?
To see the expression on it face!
How many dead babies can fit in a barrel?
4 1/2.
What’s red and lies in all four corners of the room?
A baby that’s been playing with a chainsaw.
What is [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 7
How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole?
Stick a javelin through it’s head.
What’s blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A baby with a punctured lung.
Why did the baby fall off the swing?
Because it had no arms or legs.
What is pink and red and sits in a corner?
A baby chewing on razor [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 6
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in a swimmingpool?
Bob
What’s the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend?
I don’t kiss my girlfriend after sex.
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs laying on a beach?
Sandy.
Why did the dead baby cross the road?
It was [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 5
What’s the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline?
When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
What’s the difference between a bucket of gravel and a bucket of baby guts?
You can’t gargle gravel.
What do you get when you dislocate a dead baby’s jaw?
Deep Throat.
What is better than a dead baby?
The revoked child-support.
Why [...] -
Dead Baby jokes 4
What’s more fun than feeling up a dead baby?
Feeling up a dead baby with three nipples
How do you make a man pregnant?
Stick a dead baby up his ass!
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs laying in a ditch?
Phil.
How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?
Two, one [...] -
Dead Baby jokes 3
How do you know when a baby is a dead baby?
The dog plays with it more.
What’s blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A baby with a punctured lung.
What’s purple, covered in pus and squeals?
A peeled baby in a bag of salt.
What do you get when you have sex with a pregnant woman?
A baby [...] -
Dead Baby jokes 2
What’s funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down syndrome.
What’s brown and gurgles?
A baby in a casserole.
How do you stop a baby crawling round in circles ?
Nail its other hand to the floor.
What’s blue and thrashes about on the floor?
A baby playing in a plastic bag.
How many babies does [...] -
Dead Baby Jokes 1
What’s funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown costume!
How do you make a dead baby float?
Take your foot off of it’s head.
Why are test tube babies the most beautiful ones?
Because they’re hand made.
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean?
Fucked.
What do [...]
