Archive for the ‘polish jokes’ Category
-
CRASH
CRASH
Question: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash?
Answer: The pilot got cold, so he turned off the fan. -
CONSTIPATED
CONSTIPATED
A Polish man was suffering from constipation, so his doctor prescribed suppositories. A week later the Pole complained to the doctor that they didn’t produce the desired results.
“Have you been taking them regularly?” the doctor asked.
“What do you think I’ve been doing,” the [...] -
A CLASSIC
A CLASSIC
Question: How many Poles does it take to change a light bulb?
Answers:
3. One to stand on a chair and hold the bulb and the other two to
spin the chair.
Or this one…
[...] -
CHAINSAW
CHAINSAW
A Polish man is looking to buy a saw to cut down some trees in his back yard. He goes to a chainsaw shop and asks about various chainsaws. The dealer tells him, “Look, I have a lot of models, but why don’t you save yourself a lot of time and [...] -
CALL AAA
CALL AAA
Question: Did you hear about the Polish man that locked his keys in his car?
Answer: He had to use a coat hanger to get his family out. -
BURIED TREASURE
BURIED TREASURE
One Russian and one Polish workman were digging the foundations for a new home. After several hours, the Polish man’s shovel hits on something hard. Both men work hurriedly to dig the object out and discover that it is a treasure chest.
On opening it they find [...] -
BODY COUNT
BODY COUNT
A 747 recently crashed in a cemetery in Poland. Polish officials have so far retrieved 2000 bodies. -
BRIDGING THE GAP
BRIDGING THE GAP
The Polish government was tired of being the brunt of so many jokes about their stupidity so they decided to start a building project to prove that they weren’t as dumb as the rest of the world made them out to be.
“Gentlemen,” said the Minister [...] -
BIRD BRAIN
BIRD BRAIN
A Polish, English, and French guy are running away from the German soldiers when they come up to a forest and they decide to hide by each climbing a tree.
When the Germans arrive, they go to the first tree where the English guy is, and [...] -
BAG BET
BAG BET
A Polish man was walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He ran into one of his buddies, who asked,
“Hey! What’s in the bag?”
The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend [...] -
BAD VIBES
BAD VIBES
Question. Why don’t Polish women use vibrators?
Answer. It chips their teeth. -
ARMY JOKE
ARMY JOKE
Question: How do you stop a Polish army on horseback?
Answer: Turn off the carousel. -
ACCIDENT
ACCIDENT
Did you hear about the terrible automobile accident last night? A Polish family on vacation lost all of their children. The pickup truck they were riding in ran off the road into a lake and sank to the bottom. The parents got out of the cab OK but all the kids [...] -
A REALLY LONG BOX
A REALLY LONG BOX
A Polish man went to a carpenter and asked, “Can you build me a box that is two inches high, two inches wide, and fifty feet long?”
“Hmm…” mused the carpenter. “It could be done, I suppose, but what would you want a box like [...]
