• Dead Baby Jokes 14

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    How do you get a baby to run faster?
    Chase it with the lawn mower.
    What do you get when you put a dead baby in a blender?
    Hold on. I’ll tell you in a second.
    What’s pink and spits?
    A baby in a frying pan.
    What’s the best sound in the world?
    Hearing dead baby’s hips crack under pressure!
    How many dead [...]

  • Dead Baby Jokes 13

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    What’s the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies?
    I don’t have a Cadillac in my garage.
    What’s the best thing about a Siamese twin baby?
    Threesomes.
    What is the definition of revenge?
    A baby with a dog in its mouth.
    What’s the difference between a baby and a bagel?
    You can put a bagel in the toaster. You [...]

  • Dead Baby Jokes 12

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    What’s worse than a dead baby in a trashcan lid?
    A trashcan lid in a dead baby.
    What’s the difference between a lamp and a dead baby?
    It’s really easy to turn on a lamp.
    What’s pink and chunky?
    A baby with leprosy.
    Why did the baby cross the road?
    It was stapled to the chicken.
    What’s the difference between a dead baby [...]

  • Dead Baby Jokes 11

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    How many dead babies does it take to make a bottle of baby oil?
    It depends on how hard you squeeze them.
    What’s small, and shiny, and blue?
    A baby with a plastic baggy over its head.
    What’s got four wheels, smokes and squeals?
    A bus load of babies on fire.
    Why is there always hot water at childbirth?
    In case of [...]

  • Dead Baby Jokes 9

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    Why do you stick a baby in the blender feet first?
    So you can see the expression on its face!
    What’s worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning?
    Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.
    What’s the difference between a dead baby and a felt tip marker?
    You don’t get [...]

  • Dead Baby Jokes 8

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    How do you get 100 babies into a bucket?
    With a blender!
    Why do you put a baby in the blender feet first ?
    To see the expression on it face!
    How many dead babies can fit in a barrel?
    4 1/2.
    What’s red and lies in all four corners of the room?
    A baby that’s been playing with a chainsaw.
    What is [...]

  • Dead Baby Jokes 7

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole?
    Stick a javelin through it’s head.
    What’s blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
    A baby with a punctured lung.
    Why did the baby fall off the swing?
    Because it had no arms or legs.
    What is pink and red and sits in a corner?
    A baby chewing on razor [...]

  • Dead Baby Jokes 6

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in a swimmingpool?
    Bob
    What’s the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend?
    I don’t kiss my girlfriend after sex.
    What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs laying on a beach?
    Sandy.
    Why did the dead baby cross the road?
    It was [...]

  • Dead Baby Jokes 5

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    What’s the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline?
    When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
    What’s the difference between a bucket of gravel and a bucket of baby guts?
    You can’t gargle gravel.
    What do you get when you dislocate a dead baby’s jaw?
    Deep Throat.
    What is better than a dead baby?
    The revoked child-support.
    Why [...]

  • Dead Baby jokes 4

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    What’s more fun than feeling up a dead baby?
    Feeling up a dead baby with three nipples
    How do you make a man pregnant?
    Stick a dead baby up his ass!
    What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs laying in a ditch?
    Phil.
    How many dead babies does it take to change a tire?
    Two, one [...]

  • Dead Baby jokes 3

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    How do you know when a baby is a dead baby?
    The dog plays with it more.
    What’s blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
    A baby with a punctured lung.
    What’s purple, covered in pus and squeals?
    A peeled baby in a bag of salt.
    What do you get when you have sex with a pregnant woman?
    A baby [...]

  • Dead Baby jokes 2

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    What’s funnier than a dead baby?
    A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down syndrome.
    What’s brown and gurgles?
    A baby in a casserole.
    How do you stop a baby crawling round in circles ?
    Nail its other hand to the floor.
    What’s blue and thrashes about on the floor?
    A baby playing in a plastic bag.
    How many babies does [...]

  • Dead Baby Jokes 1

    Monday, December 15th, 2008

    What’s funnier than a dead baby?
    A dead baby in a clown costume!
    How do you make a dead baby float?
    Take your foot off of it’s head.
    Why are test tube babies the most beautiful ones?
    Because they’re hand made.
    What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean?
    Fucked.
    What do [...]